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Saturday, April 9, 2011

Discouraged, Disheartened, and Discombobulated

If you read my previous post, you know about the spinal issues I was diagnosed with four years ago (and never told about), and that I was getting a new cervical spine MRI done. I made it through the MRI, and the two days recuperation period after, and was supposed to see my pain management specialist the following Monday to discuss the results. Unfortunately, his office called to reschedule that appointment until April 18th. So I did what anybody in my position (i.e., desperately wanting to know the results) would do: I went to see my primary doctor to have her get me the results.

And the results? Nothing.

The radiologist report states that the curve in my cervical spine is good and states nothing else but a hemangioma at my T3 vertebra. Again, if you read my last post, you'll know that four years ago there was loss of cervical curve, significant diffuse disc bulging, and a hemangioma at my T2 vertebra.

Obviously, there's something wrong with this picture. Literally.

I had taken my medical records with me and showed my primary doctor the radiologist reports from four years ago, showing the issues stated above. While she didn't outwardly agree that the radiologist read the latest MRI incorrectly, she did encourage me to obtain the actual MRI scans from four years ago (which, thankfully, I already have) and take them with me when I see the pain management specialist on April 18th.

I'm so upset! This has turned into quite a Sisyphean effort to find out what is wrong with me, what is wrong with my neck. I can feel that there's something wrong, and I have the headaches, facial pain, and trigeminal neuralgia to prove it!

On top of all that, I have to prove to the insurance company who pays my long-term disability that I am unable to work any job. The first 24 months of LTD was approved because I could no longer perform my last job of Academic Counselor at a university. I've started drafting the letter, trying to explain my limitations, my inability to do almost anything. But without a solid diagnosis of what is really, physically wrong with me, how am I supposed to support my claims?

Xanax powers activate!

Gentle hugs and keep pushing that rock uphill,

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